Saturday, 10 June 2017

The paradox of change

The paradox of change states that it is more likely to change in good, whenever you are satisfy wherever you are.

It seems like a cruel game nature play with us, where the people that most dispersal need change and have the biggest desire to do so, actually have the lowest chance to change in good.

There are two types of problems you can have in life, problems with a practical solution that you can make it better or resolve it through a series of actions.

And problems that are unsolvable like a terminal disease for example, regardless that you can't do anything about the disease itself, you have some option over your perception of that unfortunate situation.

Which will result in different outcomes of quality of life. If you resent and resist your disease you are going to experience a lot of anxiety which is going to lower the quality of your life. If you accept the fact that you have an incurable disease and that you are going to die early you are living your life based on certainty, which is the opposite of anxiety, you are still going to die early but you don't have to have the last part of your life dominated by anxiety.

Whenever something is wrong, your body will send you feedback as pain. Regardless the fact that the problem is one with a practical solution or it is unsolvable and you just have to learn to accept it. There is not an immediate practical solution to the pain itself, there is very little you can do for the pain.

Even if we are talking about a problem with a practical solution, there is a delayed effect until you start taking action and you start solving your problem it is going to take a while, so you will have to experience pain for a significant period of time.

This is where a lot of people struggle, because they don't realize that pain is an unsolvable problem with no practical solution, that you just need to learn to accept they go back into denial, after a short attempt to change, the pain still persist so they relapse. And they are trapped in this vicious cycle their entire lives sometimes.

This is why the immediate solution to any problem is acceptance, even if there is something practical you can do, before you act you must accept the pain.

Without acceptance of pain you will slip back into denial and reverse back at having severe blind spots, that will cause you to repeat your mistakes over and over again.      

It is not the intensity of pain that causes the denial, it is the lost of hope that your pain is going to get any better, which is never true because you can either do something about it or accept it and reduce your anxiety about it.

If you have some pain in your body, you can definitely bare it otherwise it wouldn't be there. It is not the pain that it is harmful, as the pain is just the alarm that is letting you know that something is wrong. Turning the alarm to early with any form of sedation it will decrease your chance of properly taking care of yourself.

The moment you sedate yourself is the moment you stop learning, experience is not enough to learn. Everybody has experience, but not everybody is self-actualized. We learn out of consciousness not experience. It is being conscious of your experience that allows you to learn.    

No comments:

Post a Comment